i was born in the right decade. the decade of the selfie and googling the answers to hard problems.
that’s about it. fuck those guys
And God said unto Abraham, “Abraham.”
And Abraham replied, “What.”
God said to John, “Come forth and receive eternal life.” But John came fifth and won a toaster.
And Judas approached the rabbis and Pharisees saying, “The one whom I kiss is the one you seek.”
To which they responded, “Gay.”
And thus, god made Eve. And she was bammin’ slammin’ bootylicious.
see you all in hell
COOL DATE IDEA: cry on the floor by urself listening to the maine